Before Day One.
2021 in Review.
There is always the hype about the new year and the possibilities that comes with it. It’s a brand new slate, and the energy is high. Unfortunately for me, I didn’t start 2021 with a fresh slate.
New year. Old baggage.
I was supposed to finish my degree in 2020, but I had an extra year to deal with it. I was mad at myself for having an extra year. Dealing with that level of failure paralyzed me. My self-esteem was in the mudddd. I started sinking into depression with no lifeline in sight. The pandemic didn’t particularly help because it elongated the extra time I needed in school. I stumbled through January in pain and numbness simultaneously until I decided to speak to a friend, which started the healing process. To top it off, I was broke-broke cause I wasn’t working (Wahalurrr upon wahalurrrr)
Healing
Amid all that, writing saved me. There is something about transferring words to a page that is soothing. There is no judgement, just honesty and pure relief. I dealt with my pain and numbness by writing poems (which eventually became my first published book, Self Awakening). It took long hours to process my emotions through my writing to gain my confidence back.
Courage.
One of my favourite quotes is that you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. I stumbled on the quote in March, and it gave me the ginger to apply for jobs. I wanted something in communications and not Microbiology even though I had no work experience, just personal projects. At the end of March, I had two job offers and I chose the one I currently work at (Tech4Dev).
Love
It baffles me that two people can be good to each other and still not work out. Good to each other, but not the best fit. I was off the streets at the beginning of the year, and it was bliss while it lasted. It hurt that we had to part, but staying together would have hurt more in the long run. His love was soft, and I am grateful I got to experience that. We go again in 2022.
Friendships
They take effort and time because intentionality is the basis of great friendships. Some of my friendships thrived, while some didn’t. I think it is because I lost common ground with some of my friends. It is sad to grow apart from some people, but life happens. I had so many ‘my-heart-is-so-full’ and ‘I-love-you-so-much’ moments with my family and friends, so that was a big win.
Faith.
Faith is tricky, very tricky. It can turn to performance quickly, so I decided I wouldn’t do any of that in 2021. I also didn’t want blind faith anymore. I took a deep dive into research and reading on Christianity, found many interesting things that changed my worldview. The whole “love your neighbour’ phrase became real. I grew more accepting of others. Now, I no longer subscribe to many doctrines, but like Brain Zahnd said, “My love is for others, my doctrine is for me “.
Experiments.
I tried things in 2021. From affiliate marketing to podcasting to content creation in a bid to prove to myself that I can do anything I want (if I get out of my head long enough). Another thing I found out is, content is engrained in my DNA (na follow come).
I took up an interest in content design/UX writing. So far, I have gotten scholarships to help my learning process, started a UX writing community, and got my first UX writing gig (Yay!).
Daily living
- My level of forgetfulness spiked in 2021, or maybe I never really noticed it was always there. It cost me a few things.
- Growing too fast is a thing. It is overwhelming.
- Taking deeeep breaths does wonders. Inhale slowly for 4 seconds, exhale slowly through the mouth for 6 seconds.
- I enjoyed learning but not implementing (a tough spot to be in.)
- Reading books and making TikTok videos made me very happy.
- I had anxiety attacks because I kept my emotions bottled
- I enjoyed making my own money.
- Priority management > time management
2021 was a bitter-sweet year for me but a great year still. A lot happened in the past 365 days. I’m finally starting 2022 on a new slate and I am hyped about the next 364 days. Today is day one again, and it is time to get it!
Happy new yeearrrrrrrrrrrrrrr and welcome to the new dispensation.
PS: Photo dumppp, just because.
